My First Stage Speech

While I was in IV grade of school, I was fortunate enough to be one of the good rankers in the class. But that didn’t stop with the school day privileges of the monitoring the class and all. Our class teacher had a weird rule. All the top rankers of the class must participate in the elocution competition. Well, I had a date arranged with the biggest demon of myself. I didn’t have the courage to tell no to my class teacher either.

That was it. The competition was a week away and the given topic was “Indira Gandhi”.

My sister was so excited and my dad was too. He even went one step higher. When he found that I was trying to chicken out by all means, he came up with the best of deals. That really sounded great. I had a great liking for toy guns in that age. Of all the toys I ever had in my childhood, gun would form at least 70% of them. I never asked for any other crackers during Diwali, I just used to get a revolver typed toy and spend the whole Diwali season blasting the roll crackers.

I remember every type of toy guns I had – the revolver type that I just mentioned, double barrel rifle type, a stylish pistol type which actually looked like a real gun and this pistol was loaded with yellow balls, a long rifle type with loading mechanism very similar to the rifles that I saw in movies and I don’t remember ever having the guns fitted with lights and stuffs. I had a taste just for the realistic looking ones and not the ‘toyish’ ones even if it was just a toy.

Once while shopping in a fancy store, I came across a biggest ever rifle toy I had ever seen. I asked for the rifle to my dad. Only when he enquired the shopkeeper about it, I came to know that it was a real rifle that can be used to shoot birds. He also said that he would arrange for the license and other formalities if we buy it. I know that it was too much for a boy of my age to have a real rifle. The IV grade school kid in me didn’t look it as practical as I see it now. So I just wanted it. But my dad somehow convinced me off it that day. I didn’t realize then that he would be having this in memory.

So this was his deal – If I take part in the elocution competition the rifle would be mine. The master mind of operation blue star was giving me an opportunity to get myself a ‘real’ rifle. Still the freezing freak inside me was not ready to take up the challenge. It felt like, ok you know how it feels like to speak in front of the whole school. (I am not talking to some of you who regularly read out the pledge and prayers in the assembly, I am talking to all others who feel the same dread of standing before a non-violent gadget called mic. May be, I wouldn’t even feel the same dread if someone points my favourite pistol between my eyes).

The competing instincts inside me made me to accept the challenge. Fast forward to the day of the competition. My school had another weird rule. It was just a school level competition but it had a screening we have to get through before we speak in front of the school. I had to repeat the speech a number of times for each one of my teachers. They were not convinced that I could deliver it and so they didn’t select me to the next level.

I couldn’t accept that. I asked for one last chance. This was the biggest irony – I had to plead for chance which I was happy to forgo earlier. Finally, the headmistress of the school heard me deliver the speech flawlessly and she allowed me to take the stage.

“Fear is not real” – a dialogue from the recent movie by Indian director Night Shymalan – After Earth. I didn’t know this then and it didn’t matter any way.

All the participants were made to sit in an order. So I knew precisely when my turn would come and how many were ahead of me. I could hear my heart pounding as one by one every participant before me complete their turns. It was like a countdown to hell. Should I pretend to vomit and dodge the demon? Crazy ideas sprung of my adrenaline pumped mind.

Girls who were near to me were busy going through their transcripts and making sure that they remember everything word by word by repeating them to their friends who were in equal stress. I acted cool by having my transcript folded in my shirt pocket but only I knew that even that sheet on my pocket could feel my heart beat unusually fast due to fright.

Three, two and one. Jai Hind! I heard the whole school clapping as the girl who was just before me completed her speech. So it was my turn finally, I stood up and walked towards the mic. That was the first time I was ever standing on that stage. I didn’t even know how close I should stand to the mic so that my voice would be heard clearly!

“Good Morning to everyone present here…”I started and continued. I occasionally even heard my breath echoed by the speakers placed all along the corridors of our school. Not taking into account a few stumbles due to not lack of practice, mine was a pretty decent speech although delivered completely in a monotonous voice. I felt my knees trembling through the course of the speech and hoped the front row girls wouldn’t notice it. I was more concerned about it because I was wearing shorts. But at last when I finally said, “Thank you” nothing mattered much and what remained was just the high of having fought my demon for the first time.

It was truly exhilarating and made me take part in the competition the next year too but this time not out of compulsion. If you ever happen to see me speak in stage now, you would really feel the long way I have come!

And finally, if you are one of those who are wondering whether I got the rifle, it was just a trick by my dad to entice me into taking part in the competition and I never got it. But I got an even better weapon – my voice!